What Victoria Beckham taught me about swimming...

And an invitation to our first live Substack session!

I’ve been thinking about the phrase “I’m fine.” It slips out easily, buys us time and perhaps gives other people comfort, too. In a world increasingly focused on mental health, we might think that’s a bad thing. But I don’t. Our minds are powerful places.

Understanding the mental game

I’ve just come off a long few weeks of many events and a lot of work. If I let myself think I was tired halfway through, I’d never make it to the end. Pacing ourselves is vital, particularly at this time of year.

I watched the Victoria Beckham documentary on Netflix recently and she’s someone who does this brilliantly. Even when everything was about to come crashing down around her knees, she held fast and stayed focused. That’s how we make it to the end.

The juggle is real!

I must have said “I’m fine” more times than I can count over the last few weeks. There’s not just been a load of work on, I’ve also been going in to see my mum in hospital as often as I possibly could, as she was totally immobile, unable to feed herself for the first few weeks. If I didn’t go in, she’d barely get the chance to eat as nurses could only come and help her once everyone else had been given their food.

In the middle of all this, I had a long shoot for some new year wellbeing content so stayed down in London, hoping to wake up refreshed and ready rather than having the long two hour drive. Instead, the fire alarm went off twice in the middle of the night, so I had to do it on five hours of disturbed menopausal sleep - there’s NO getting back to sleep these days when things like that happen!

Just Keep Swimming

And that pretty much sums up this year. It’s gone in a completely different direction from the one I anticipated. It’s been shaped by needing to put other people first, not always family either - and I’m not saying that resentfully, not even reluctantly, as it’s been a real pleasure — but it’s the reality of life.

All the responsibilities that come with family, work, care, etc, pull our attention outward before we’ve even had a moment to ask ourselves what we need - and that’s why we need to pace ourselves. Survival is crucial, but recovery is even more so! Hence, the sofa, Netflix, and Victoria Beckham. It was much needed, and I didn’t just feel topped up, I was also inspired by her story and reminded that we just have to keep going, doing what we do. If you’ve seen Nemo, you’ll absolutely remember Dory’s mantra Just Keep Swimming.

While I started the year with some exciting creative ideas that have barely left the starting blocks, it’s been a fulfilling year in so many other ways. And I’m healthy and well, which counts for a LOT! And the older I get, the less panicky I am about productivity and the more I value presence - I guess it’s about finding balance between the two. Some days fall by the wayside, some weeks flush down the drain, and yes, some years are part and parcel of making change. That’s all okay. We’re living. We’re doing life. The twists and turns are part of the gig!

I do, however, feel a new lease of life bubbling up inside me. It’s almost as if since cutting my hair off, there’s been a new spring in my step and I’m excited for what’s next! As I look toward 2026, I’m a little nervous to get too excited about it, but I’m carefully massaging some of those creative ideas, bringing them to the surface again, in a way that I haven’t been able to for the last couple of years.

One of those things is a new podcast - and I’ll tell you more about that as and when things become more definite. What I will tell you now, though, is that I’m going to retire the ‘Women What Whistle’ title here on Substack. The podcast will remain out there and there are over 100 episodes to listen to on confidence, midlife, eating disorders, menopause, people pleasing etc. that all continue to be as relevant today as they were when I recorded them. In fact, here’s a link:

Now that I’ve started thinking about 2026 - only a few weeks away now - I’m beginning to plan what comes next, and I have a little invitation for you.

Every year, I have a very special practice that I do before the end of December, when I sit down and journal. It’s a precious hour where I reflect on the year gone by, sit with whatever needs sitting with, and bring everything to a close so I can step into the new year feeling cleansed and refreshed, ready to start again. I find it really helps with purpose, with marking events, and with helping time slow down.

JOIN ME ON ZOOM FOR A NEW YEAR PREP CHAT

So, I’m going to share that session with you on Sunday 28th December at 7pm. I’ll send out a Zoom link closer to the time - just make sure you’re on the subscription list because it will go out there. It’s totally free, I just ask that you bring a willingness to be still, a pen and paper, and for an hour, we will sit together and ‘write the year,’ bringing it to a close. It would be so lovely to have you there with me.

I find it an intentional and mindful way to curate life, safeguarding the things that matter, and setting some goals so that life feels purposeful. We all need purpose, it doesn’t matter how big or small. This photo is from a recent shoot where I was talking about how important the journaling process is to me; I even took my journal along, you can see it there on the bed.

Making changes in our lives takes intention, and that’s what Victoria Beckham has done. If you strip away the gloss and the fashion empire and the Spice Girls and the WAGs, you see someone who has carefully and deliberately evolved through subtle recalibrations. It doesn’t happen by accident.

She paid attention to what she wanted to do, and got on with it, one day at a time, not listening to the haters or those laughing at her, but by making babysteps, starting again and learning from the bottom up. I was really impressed, and inspired by her determination to create her future according to what she wanted to do.

Nothing Changes if Nothing Changes

But change doesn’t happen when the clock strikes midnight, it happens slowly and quietly, and intentionally. So it would be great if you could join me on December 28th. And even if you can’t, as we start tumbling into the festivities of the season, try to carve out some time to think about the year that has just been, and what you’d like to see in the year ahead. I promise you won’t regret it.